saving the day

A group of lads were walking on a dusty track , away from the urban noise . They were through from all of whatever they might do to spend their times there in their dying full of epidemics city . Hot summer day , humid climate . There is nothing to do to have some fun , that's what is controling their minds , to look for a new experience of joy . No more enthusiam in the joysticks of PSP , boring company in cinemas , same movies and talk shows on TV , same girls with their tiny horizons and plastic bodies , same restaurants and cafe's , same vegtable meals at home , same devices , iPhones , iPads , and there's no money left ...
They've left their cars , because one of them found himself sick of this life and he would do anything to just get out of this city , this land of no hope . So they followed him , not because they care for him, but just for a change , they thought , let's go to the nature , maybe they'll find a wild horse that they could try and tame . Or a wild bear that could kill them and that would be a relief from all of this bordum ! 

As he moved forward , and the rest of them were messing around , one singing beside one tree jumping to another , other had plugged in his headphones and started to watch a scene on youtube ... He just moved , cursing the day his mother bgave birth to him and let him put his feet on this earth .
He walked on a rocky hill , and after some minutes he heard splashing water , he kept walking till he found a waterfall between the rocks , and down that hill there was this lake that none of them knew of it before . 

 

 It was deep and dangerous , he stood on the cliff and glanced to the water .
He was a writer in some magazine  , he used to write about life issues , new daily thoughts , till all of his ideas came to a blocked end . He hated this job of low salary , hated his workplace that is 3.5 kilometers away from home , hated his coworkers , and most importantly hated this dull city with it's street children, carts pulled by donkeys  , beggars show up every 10 minutes beside a bus stop or a metro station ...he hated his noisy neighbours  when they usually quarell and make a fuss in the whole building .

 One of his mates grabbed his arm and asked him what he was doing . 

- " thinking ..."
- " of jumping ? haha ! " , his mate joked . 
-" mmm ..." 
-" hey i was joking ! Don't do that , you might hurt yourself , and maybe die . " 
He looked at the waterfall underneath the cliff .
- "  yeah . "
He moved away his arm from his mate's hand , and his mate shouted at him this time warning . 
- " Hey , it's just a jump ! I am not gonna die , it's not that dangerous , i just want to take a  i just want to take a dive down there , it's hot anyway ...  I am out of thoughts , and my job is at stake , i am going down there , maybe if i leap from here to there , i'd be struck by a dreadful feeling that would inspire me , maybe if i sunk in this lake i'd be brainwashed from everything i saw in this city , and be inspired by the countless bubbles of oxygen that i will seek after to gain extra seconds of life before i can reach the air again . Maybe if i stayed for few minutes under water i'll know another meaning of life to write about , different from this place we are stucked in , and save my job ! And maybe ..maybe i'll die if i drown or hit a rock , i don't know if it will be worth regretting , but you my friend , can tell the people about someone who just wanted to jump off the hill just to have a new experience he can write about to save his day . “

A Third Path

This pumping of blood inside my heart , and the knocks of ideas inside my head .

These non stop tipping of  my feet edges . The need to jump and dance .
An instantaneous leap of something inside me !

This moment , i really might not have a clue what i am about to write in the next lines ...so i'll just leave my fingers to lead this topic to whatever end it's gonna be . 

So my fingers are waiting for my brain , because it tells them about things they are gonna write down now :

I am a screwed up person right now , i can see two paths , yet blurry ones . There are these signs are put in the entrances of each . One that carry these address  " the care of God , the safe religious side , the way to find peace , go traditional this way .  " .

 The other's address " You want to try life by another concept created by you , and you know what God wants from you along this way , go and try your life concepts , go by your whims this way . "

And i found myself in this crossroad , me standing on this level on the ground , and above me , there are countless levels ,each has a pressure on me , and they have their own weights . And i just have this leap inside me that tells me ' just pick a side already ' .

such levels ....

Precautions level :
My parents , they have this big role of shaping my life , greatest pressure above all other levels .
Telling me what i should , and what i shouldn't . Sometimes i find myself not able to find my own direction because of their ideologies they planted inside me , which i don't regret most of the concepts i gained , but there is always a but !
Ethics , the liberty of actions .

Society level :

The second biggest pressure on me , the acknowledgement , the conflicts of cultures , the classes of people .

 I know many of those that i know don't really like my recent attitudes , thoughts .

What will the society will make of me ? One day i go riot , the next day i accept being surrounded by mimes , actors and ..halabala!  ( none sense )
 Society is the stage for the theatrical plays .

emotions level :

What i desire , and long for .

What i hate ? My experiences and so .
Expectations level :

The painting of the future that i always add something to it , feels like a wonderland ! Will this painting ever come to life ?

and other minor levels which i can't think of right now .

So me there , in this crossroad . Ridiculously , i find my self putting my left foot on one side , and my right foot on the other , which might work in the beginning of the crossroad , when challenges are still doesn't demand a big frank attitude from a certain ideology . Nevertheless , when bigger conflicts appear in the battle field , and the distances grow between these two paths , i would have to remove one of my legs from one of them ...



I have this  tendency towards the first one , Salafi way , but i still carry inside me some of the earthly concepts i can carry along . Because i don't like the idea to belong to some groups that i might find myself have to put on even a half mask to go along with their current . I don't want to even wear even a small fractured piece of a mask i don't believe in ,to go along with a group , who carry most of the answers to life but not all .

I will draw a third line , and will remove my feet from the first two . With only the belief of God , as my savior , my creator , my refuge , my friend , my love , my everything . Then i will see where i will end .

2011 was ...

2011 was a year of adversity , indeed ! 

it was a year of countless death of strangers to me , from the whole world , celebrities , martyrs ... and also a death of a one who was close . 

world population reached 7 Billion ! 

the death of Osama Bin Ladin 

Japan's earthquake ... well i'll leave the video to show the rest :)

فتحنا معرض !

اول مرة اشترك في نشاط زي ده .. ابويا جاب لي شوية لوح خشب علشان انفذ عليه لوح فنية ..

اللي كان مستفذ بقي ان انا لو ابتديت في لوحة لازم اخلصها في ساعتها ... فاللوح طالعة بالمنظر ده ! الصراحة هم مش حلويين بس ييجي مني 

كانت تجربة لذيذة ، عملناها اول مرة في الايام العشرة الاخيرة من رمضان سنة 2011 ..اخويا عمر كان جيه معايا اول يوم ، طبعا مكنش حابب بس جيه . ز لو ان الموضوع مكنش ناجح بالنسبة ليا انا اول مرة ، بس حبيت اطور نفسي اكتر ..فأنا نويت اني لما أخد فترة راحة من الكلية ..(شكلها حتبقي الصيف اللي جي   )  لازم اتعلم الاتقان و الصبر شوية في مشغولاتي و الا  ..فملوش لازمة بقي !  

 عملت اعلان كمان لترويج المشروع

نور ليلي

آذان جميل من اذاعة القرآن الكريم

الابتهال التالي يذكرني بأيام رمضانية و ايام الطفولة 

ابتهال نصر الدين طوبار

وحشة ليلي ، وحشة الوحدة و الظلام . ما من مخلوق قد يهدئ حقا من روعي . قد كٌتب علي ان ايأس في الليل ، و آمل في النهار . فما وجدت الا تلك الكلمات البليغة في اذاعة قديمة ما زالت . ابتهالات و مناجات . قراءأت و تلاوات . اجتهادات و حسنات . مبارك شيوخها و علمائها

i wish if there is a way which is more functioning than words or a sonnet , that really expresses emotions , and succeed in recording the instantaneous impressions and reactions inside us . Some times it works by a piece of music , or even a picture captured ...but what if there is no available light for a photo to be taken ? and no qualifications to play the right music ?

خرا الشعب